This past Sunday, the basketball world was sent into a frenzy when owner of “Mazani Mink” hair company Masin Elije revealed that he was harassed and threatened by Washington Wizard’s center, Dwight Howard, and his team.
Elije took to Twitter with screenshots and photos of text conversations claiming that he had dated Howard, he cheated on him by attending transgender sex parties, and Howard and his crew began harassing him with homophobic comments and threats of violence. These posts have yet to be verified and may be false, but that does not excuse the homophobic backlash Howard faced.
Obviously a very serious and disgusting behavior from Howard and his crew, but if you were just reading Twitter you would have no idea that was part of the story.
What dominated the discussion was the reveal of Dwight Howard being into trans and cisgender men, many people making jokes and criticizing him for his sexuality. The privacy and safety of an innocent man is being threatened by someone in a position of power and all people want to do is make jokes about the alleged abuser liking men.
It’s yet another infuriating reminder of the country’s perception of LGBTQ individuals. They are still viewed as a punchline to a joke, as sexual deviants, as something to not be taking seriously when threatened.
Often forgotten is the concept of toxicity in men existing in not just straight men, but in all entitled men who have been put in positions of power.
This situation is so bad it even lends itself to having sympathy for Howard, even though he has established himself as a potentially violent harasser.
Since this story broke, people all over social media have been calling him homophobic slurs and insulting his sexuality. It doesn’t excuse his actions but it’s precisely a fear for a reaction like this that led to this behavior.
Individuals scared of a homophobic backlash often hide their sexuality, and when the possibility of being outed becomes reality, one can react violently, once they see that their fear was warranted.
How are men supposed to feel comfortable coming out and being themselves if this is what they must deal with? Moreover, how are men supposed to be held accountable for their actions if people care more about sensational gossip than the actions of a harasser?
How are LGBTQ individuals supposed to feel safe when their revealing of harassment leads only to mockery?
This situation can be used as an example for both what to do and what not to do in response to LGBTQ individuals coming out of the closet. One must give them a comfortable and accepting environment for them to properly come out. Also, one must be called out for toxic and vile behavior.
LGBTQ support is important, and a big part of support is making sure that people are held accountable on the same level as everyone else.
Gay or straight, trans or cis, toxicity is still toxicity.